Centering Joy with a Simple Practice
Because it's been a long year and it's only January
Wow um…..I guess buckle up because good god almighty January roared in with a very large F you to all. To start, the LA fires have been profoundly upsetting to watch from afar and I can’t imagine the devastation up close. I did the only thing I could do and donated to Baby2Baby in hopes some comfort makes it to the families who need it most.
On top of that, the felon taking up residence in the White House means my timeline won’t stop yelling at me about the myriad horrible things he’s doing/planning to do/dreaming of doing. And to top it all off, the germs are REALLY making themselves known this year. We’ve cycled through stomach bugs, sinus problems, and the flu all since the start of the year—leading to many cancelled trips and plans.
So. That’s how 2025 is going thus far.
I’ve know since the holidays that I wanted to write this particular newsletter but I didn’t know how apropos it would be. Finding some way to center joy in our lives in this literal season (the depths of dark winter) and in this season of our nation’s history may seem like an empty pursuit but finding some spark in the slog is more important than ever. And a moment over the holidays demonstrated for me that it doesn’t have to be all that difficult.
A couple days after Christmas my sisters, our husbands, and I packed up our cumulative six children and drove up into the mountains in Colorado for a nighttime holiday train ride through the peaks. It was picturesque. A soft snowfall had begun just as the train pulled away from the station and the staff were warm and kind. We sipped hot drinks (spiked cider in my case—so good) and enjoyed the view.
But, things got a little hairy post train ride when the snow really started to pick up (we learned on the way down that the mountains were expected to get 9 inches in just a few hours). The mood in the car was tense as we navigated the slippery roads down the mountain. In our car it was my sisters and two of the older kids.
In a moment of brilliance my older sister started to ask the kids about their favorite memories from our time together. As they happily shared a few she asked if they’d like to learn a way to hold onto those happy memories so they could think back to them whenever they needed a little moment of joy. The kids were enthusiastic and the whole moment ended up feeling very profound and sweet.
I’m going to walk you through the exercise she shared with us (she didn’t create this practice but I’m so glad she shared it) and I highly recommend using this technique to create a joyful memoy you can draw on when the heaviness of the world is weighing you down. I’ll also share the memory I locked in on as she led us through the exercise.
Creating a Joy Memory
Close your eyes and think about a moment in life when you experienced pure joy. In the car in that moment I actually thought about the day before when I stood on top of a mountain in the falling snow at a ski resort and watched my daughter ski for the first time.
Bring all your senses into focus around that memory. What did you feel in your body in that moment? I remember feeling calm and clear-headed because of the crisp mountain air. I felt grounded in nature. I recall the feeling of the snow nipping at my cheeks and the cold wind brushing my fingers.
Think of who you were with and the energy you were sharing. I was with my daughter feeling incredible pride at her bravery. I remember her beaming with joy and me smiling back and encouraging her.
What did you smell and hear? I could smell the snow on the air and hear the kids laughing as they skied.
What did you see in that moment? I remembering seeing snow-capped pines and other mountain peaks and thinking how lucky I was to be in my favorite place.
Now focus on the joy of that memory and give the memory a name that evokes that singular feeling. I named mine “Mountain Air.”
Now you’ve created a joy memory and named it so you call it up and hopefully bring yourself right back to those sensations and the joy you felt.
I hope in the year to come you give this a try. You can journal it, speak out loud to a friend, or do this exercise as a meditation. In any format it’s an achievable way to choose and center joy and to recall when.
That’s all for this week! I know I missed last week so we’re a bit behind but I’ll be back next week with Quick Thinking.